Astray

Saturday, March 31, 2007

See, this isn't a story, but...

Yeah yeah I know I promised a story next update... before remembering my finals which was about 2 days from now as I type. Was studying last night up to 4 in the morning, but I don't think I got a lot down because I was busy discussing some........well, interesting aspects of relationships with my friend. About how a person we knew was planning to remodel himself to be a "bastard" from being a perfectly fine person. Simply because his relationship life pre-evolution wasn't so smooth for him.

As you can judge by my tone, some of you who are more discerning would've figured out that I do not welcome this change. To those who didn't? Well you know now.

Surprisingly, in the aforementioned discussion, I was the one doing the explanations as to why said friend would do such a 180-degree turn sort of thing, while the other partner in the conversation was insistent on how such a change would make said friend lose all credibility in her eyes. Well, I guess gender preference would dictate part of her responses, so it's not entirely wrong, but I acknowledge the fact that "bastards" tend to have a more "fruitful" relationship than straight, conservative-valued people. I do NOT condone it in any way, because it is against my very principles, but I guess I cannot condemn it either because people do what they want to do to get what they want. They establish their own rules as to how they want to live, and some of us prefer to live under those rules while others dislike the confinement it brings. I believe that the harder you have to work for something, the better the feeling of success/happiness/euphoria/whatever-positive-feeling it brings when it does work. And if it doesn't work? Hey, maybe it's just not yet time. God knows it's hard to think of this sort of rule when you're down in the dumps, but when you look back, that's the sort of rule that would've saved a lot of unnecessary pain.

However, the "bastard" way of a relationship has, to a certain extent, more credibility when it comes to actually initializing a relationship.

Why? I don't know, maybe girls are more attracted to what is tangible than to what lies within? Maybe it's because in this modern world, what defines the length of a relationship is the amount of zeroes after the last integer in your bank account? Maybe values are just restrictions that a girl finds just too inhibitive for a healthy relationship? All are valid reasons, and I haven't even mentioned reasons I told to my convo partner."Bastards" apparently get girls fast, have an open and fast-moving relationship, enjoy said girls' company, and most likely, break up amicably once it's all over. To the modern guy, I suppose that is the ideal lifestyle. And I do not deny its attractiveness.

But at what cost?

If it alters your very basic fundamentals as to how you decide to live your life, aren't you just a love addict? Love can be sweet intoxication, but is that really worth the switch in what you believe in? Without all the moments you spend being single, would you ever know true love if it hits you in the face?

I suppose the counter-argument would be that these group of people make up for the loss of true love with the ability to dictate the flow of a relationship as they want; after all, they're not averse to releasing the girl should they find she does not suit their taste. Maybe for them, true love lies in the quantity, not quality. Maybe it's just a new-age way of love.

But I'd like to believe that there's a higher reason to live than to love.

Foolish? Maybe. Dumb? Probably; I'm still single, and smarting from a relationship that brought me more ill than good which ended 8 months ago. Said friend ended his relationship in the beginning of the year, and within less than a week of talking to a girl, got her to be his girlfriend.

But this is how I live. I live for the damn moment, whether it comes or not.

No one has to agree or disagree. It wouldn't matter if they did. This is my own script I write, and no one else's hands will dictate what I write in it.

Now excuse me, multiple integration is a-calling lol. Story update after finals I pwomisssssssse.....

1 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

updateeeeeeeeee lol

2:46 PM  

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